As I was reading from "Jesus Calling," here was His answer to me once again:
"Though I have brought many pleasures into your life, not one of them is essential. Receive My blessings with open hands. Enjoy My good gifts, but do not cling to them. Turn your attention to the Giver of all good things, and rest in the knowledge that you are complete in Me. The one thing you absolutely need is the one thing you can never lose: My Presence with you."
It can be easy for me to lose sight of how incredibly blessed I am. I am not entitled to those blessings. God could take them away at any time. Sometimes I realize that I am acting like a spoiled brat, pouting when I don't get my way. "But I want an Oompa Loompa Now!" (in my whiniest Veruca Salt voice). If you aren't familiar with Charlie and the Chocolate Factory:
Doesn't God tell us "Ask and ye shall receive?" I'm so glad God isn't like Veruca's indulgent father, giving in to her every ridiculous whim. I want what I want, but I also want for things to fall in line with His plan so here I am caught in what I want vs. what God knows is best for me. The control freak in me just wants to handle things all on my own. The growing Christian part of me wants for God to align my heart with His.
That's when I have to step back and pray. "God, please help me to love you more each day. Help me to have a heart for You and Your people and to love what You love. Help me to want only what you want for my life and to walk in obedience to Your will."