Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Birthdays and Getting Perspective

Last week I had a birthday.  I turned 35.  Yes, that is 3-5, thirty-five.  35 seems old and it has hit me hard.  I've been pretty weepy the last several weeks building up to this birthday.  It just feels like...Wow...35 and I haven't done a whole lot with my life.  Hubby started naming off the laundry list of what I've done and how I should be so thankful for all of those things.  You know, the typical...you've got two beautiful children you are raising, you are the director of a prechool and keep it going, you've lived through a lot of illness and we're blessed you're with us.  What a good Hubby he is, being so supportive while his wife gets all emotional and irrational.  He's right and all of the things he says are true, but in my mind, I guess I thought I would have done something more by now.  I started to think about how in all actuality, my life is probably about half over and I haven't done enough.  There are so many things I want to do with my life.  Grand and wonderful things.  I haven't really even started on my book and I thought I'd be almost done by now.  I haven't gotten my Master's degree yet and I'm still not sure what I want to be when I grow up.  I would have thought I'd at least have figured that out by now.  So I've been moping around thinking that I'd better start crossing things off my bucket list because it's getting longer and longer and I'm not getting any younger. 
Well, God has given me a bit of perspective.  You know, the kind that slaps you right in the face and you realize that maybe your priorities are a bit screwed up.  Since this big birthday, I have begun to think of the many things I do have to be thankful for.  For starters, I have faced death not once, but twice and God has said that it wasn't my time.  He has given me this day, the only day I'm promised, the here and now.  It's what I do with it that counts.  I also have some amazing people in my life that have given words of encouragement.  As I have talked to friends about my struggle with getting older, God has given me some words.  The message has been delivered in many different ways but I leave the conversations with the same thought: Bloom Where You're Planted.  I have come to realize that God doesn't expect every day to be some dramatic experience.  It's the little things I do each day that make up my life's story.  Raising Godly children, taking care of my family, nurturing other children through the preschool, being a good listener when people need to talk and offering encouragement.  These are all things I can do to further God's kingdom and they are what's important.
So with a renewed perspective and a thankful heart, I choose to live in the now, to be thankful for my family and for where God has placed me in this moment.  I will be working toward crossing things off of my bucket list and being thankful for life's interruptions which are opportunities for ministry.  I'm going to start on my book and see where God leads.  The first 35 years have gone by pretty quickly, so I'd better make the most of the next 35 +.

4 comments:

  1. AMEN!

    My motto: Less time cleaning, more time playing with kids!! ;) Life is just going by way to fast.

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  2. VERY interesting the things I learned about you in this post...What will your book be about? We need to talk.

    I agree with the Queen of Brussels Sprouts...less cleaning and more playing.

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  3. So so sorry that I did not call you on your birthday. It was my plan and you know how it goes with the 'best laid out plans.' Anyway, I hope it was wonderful but I am finding while reading your post, that it was a hard one. How we, as women especially, let a number get to us. How old do you feel??? My middle school students are quite the refreshing perspective as I am about to turn 36 myself next month. A few of the students have tried to figure out my age and they've arrived at 24 or 28, tops. They know the ages of my kids and still they think they've got all the math figured out. They are the gifted kids, too! Ha, Ha!! So, in all this, I am saying the following to you regarding the birthday numbers as we climb to the number 40: life is what you make it, what you have done thus far, and what you surround yourself with. Sometimes I don't feel like I've done a lot in my 35 years, but really, I've done so much more than other people I know. Different things and in different ways. Would I trade any of it? NO and that's the important part. You keep active and you look young so don't worry about a number. It's only a number which only dates the number of years you've been on this Earth. It does not show what you've done with your life and all that is yet to come....
    Love ya!!
    Stina

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  4. Thanks Stina. I miss ya, girl. Yeah, those middle school kids always think they've got it all figured out. Funny. Glad you are enjoying your new job. Love ya! I'll talk to ya soon!

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