Going by Grace

I am currently sitting in a quiet hotel room while Hubby is in work meetings.  We arrived yesterday afternoon and I have had a chance to catch up on some much needed sleep and to have fellowship with the other wives.  We decided to do our own thing this afternoon, which for me included coming back to the room for time with my Bible and quiet reflection.  I am in the process of applying to begin my master's degree at a seminary and I am supposed to be thinking and writing about my personal history, including my relationship with Christ and my spiritual pilgrimage.  I have always considered myself to be a deeply reflective person but I am finding this difficult.  There are other questions such as my motivation in preparing for ministry and vocational experience, but I am having the most difficulty with writing about my spiritual pilgrimage.  I think this is because it has been such an emotional journey and I find myself emotionally exhausted as I type and begin to relive it all.  One thing I know is true: "All things work together for the good of those that love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." ~ Romans 8:28
No matter the trial, I have been able to come through it (eventually) knowing that God is faithful and that He will use those trials in my life for His greater good.  I know that God has called me into a life of ministry and that I want to be in His will.  It is scary for me to step out in faith, because I don't know how this will all unfold.  I like to know the plan and then to have back up plans in place just in case it doesn't work out.  I've always been a big planner.  I think this is why God doesn't give me the plan ahead of time, it's part of the faith journey, to trust in Him. "The will of God will never take you where the grace of God cannot keep you."  I don't know who said this but it brings me comfort to meditate on these words, knowing that I am upheld by His grace because I certainly couldn't do this on my own.  I pray that as God guides me through each step of His plan for my life, I will be obedient to His call and step out in faith.